It is Christmas Eve and, along with our policy of spreading Christmas out, we gave the boys a present each to open up this morning. They both got identical plastic bendy buses. They were something that we had been looking for for ages, and finally found them about a week ago, hence they were a little something extra.
We had been looking for them for so long because Jake has had one of these for ages and had played so much with it that the tyres had disintegrated on it and he really missed playing with it. It was special too because my late Father bought it for him and he always played with it when we went up to visit. We would get to a certain place on the motorway on the way up to Grandpa’s and Jake would talk about playing with the bendy bus when we got there: he just loved it.
So there was much joy when these presents were opened this morning, and when Jake and Sam started playing with them we heard what turned out to be quite an emotive sound from the bendy bus that reminded me of visits to my Father, that fake engine sound when they pushed them and the wheels turned. I think this was the same for Jake who went quiet for a while until he started playing again.
This for me was a timely reminder of who would not be around this Christmas, reinforced by our visiting the rest of my family yesterday. We have now lost a whole two generations of family since the Christmases of my childhood, and my Step-Sister and I are now the eldest. Our parents and grandparents have all passed away, and it has always been a sadness for me that my Mother never got to see her grandchildren.
This is the second Christmas without my Father and I shall miss his jolly presence. When my nieces were younger he always dresses up as Father Christmas for special surprise presents on the 26th; he was in charge of the black plastic bag which collected up the packaging and wrapping paper, and did in such a way that made us laugh; and he made ridiculous guesses as to what his presents might be. Most of all he always made us very welcome and made sure everyone had the Christmas they wanted. It was never a stressful experience going home for Christmas; quite the opposite.
In this sense Christmases will never be the same again but, like our parents and grandparents before us we have to move on; and this year we are back up to three generations again as one of my nieces had a baby during the year and it is so brilliant to have children around at Christmas. This does not mean that we forget those who are not with us, it is a great time to remember them fondly. But who would have thought a noisy plastic bendy bus would have helped us to do just that this year.